Anytime I am working with the parents of adolescents, I am always excited to share insight about the pivotal concept of “counterwill” in the context of healthy development. Understanding this concept can make a tremendous difference in understanding our teenagers, especially when we feel confused or worried about their tendency to push back. First coined…

When the roots are deep, we need not fear the wind. I’ve been thinking a lot about this saying, and what it means to me as the parent of two adolescent children. When it comes to our children, ‘the wind’ can take many forms in our lives, both real and imagined. Certainly, the kids and…

Spring is finally here in many parts of the world. It is a season of new growth, new possibilities, fresh hopes, and, for many species: a mating season! Nature comes alive with the sounds of mating calls, puffed-up chests, colourful plumage meant to attract a mate, hormones and pheromones floating in the air, and battles…

As we move into September and back into the swing of school routines, homework, and after-school activities, I often remind parents to be extra sensitive to the presence of the ‘overlies’ in their children. I use the term ‘overly’ to refer to the state of being over-tired, over-excited, overwhelmed, overly frustrated, over-stretched and over-the-top with…

    There are many places in my life where my patience is tested and I am offered yet another opportunity to stretch towards maturity. This is definitely the case when dealing with the daily tensions between my children. They remind me of playful and rambunctious pups always ready to jump, leap, and attack! Playfulness can…

We have probably all heard the term ‘quality time’ in connection with parenting our children, for example: try to spend quality time with your child. As a Child and Youth Counsellor, I have always felt a little nervous about this concept because I fear it has misleading implications. In our busy lives, where time is…

I co-facilitate a study group of professionals who meet regularly to discuss Dr. Gordon Neufeld’s theories of attachment and development. Together we are a group of teachers, psychiatrists, social workers, counsellors, parent educators, alternative school educators, early childhood educators, and most of us parents, with a strong focus on understanding and forwarding attachment thinking. Next on our…

When my oldest child was eight-years-old, she began asking for a cell phone. It seemed like a ‘fun’ idea to her, and definitely in keeping with the times and trends of our young. They use technology in their day-to-day lives to keep in touch with each other in a multiple of ways, including social media…

We have entered the season of giving. Stress levels can be very high while thinking about all that we would like to give our child, perhaps dealing with long Christmas wish lists, demands, the realities of our budgets, busy schedules, and the rushing around to keep up! Pressures and expectations abound that the season should be joyous and ‘special’ for our family. This can leave us in gut-wrenching contortions, searching for…

As I give each of my children a goodnight hug and kiss, a final check for water and bathroom, and a gentle tuck of blankets to surround them with cozy warmth, I think about how far we’ve come… I reflect back on the Level I Intensive: Making Sense of Children with Dr. Neufeld in Montreal,…

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