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It’s Not Just Child’s Play

Sep 20, 2010

“All work and no play makes Jack a very dull boy.”

What is the role of play in children’s lives, and why would we want to make room for it? Play is often seen as free time that is spent without care or work. Play formed some of my happiest memories as a child, and I can still see my swing set that took me on journeys beyond my backyard. Moments spent in play are a luxury and are only present when the relational needs of the child are being met. These times are critical for brain development, as they are when children form neural networks that are involved in problem-solving and creativity. Children who lack environments that foster play actually have brains that are 20 to 30% less developed. Play is not empty time; it is how children build the brains that are required for work and learning.

All play is not created equal; it’s not about the toys, the stimulation, and the entertainment. The type of play that children's brains need is where the energy is coming from within the child to construct, build, create, and so on. This type of play is called emergent play, and in this state, you see curiosity, imagination, and discovery in full action. My husband will often groan when coming home from work to find the bathroom transformed into a swimming pool for dolls, craft sparkles that defy capture scattered from one end of the house to the other, and an overall mess created from hours of play. I remind him that it is not a mess but the imaginings of the teacher, designer, and scientist that lurk within them. It is hard to convey the look that I get in return, but the force of their play continues to outmatch his need to walk on a clean floor.

Emergent play does not typically unfold from activities with a lot of structure and rules, as this tends to confine and take the lead in terms of play. This is not to suggest that we stop these activities, but it does mean that we need to stay cognizant that structured play activities are not equal to free play. In Grade 1, my daughter informed her gym teacher that she wasn’t interested in joining his running club because she simply had enough activities and just wanted to play. I am sure her response provided him with an all-new meaning to "getting out of gym class."

Children who have a lot of stimulation from the TV or computer may report being bored away from these sources because their emergent play and energy have been stifled, subdued, or overpowered. For these golden play times to emerge, we need to do our part and ensure their relational needs are taken care of, provide the necessary materials, and a space free of stimulation. When these conditions are met, we can sit back and watch their imaginings take hold. We can rest assured that it is not just child’s play; it is creating the brains that will solve the problems of tomorrow.

Upcoming Scheduled Classes

Some of our courses are also offered as scheduled classes from time to time with our Faculty providing weekly live special support sessions. If you already have taken the course in its self-paced version, you can enrol in the scheduled class for a fee of only 50 CAD.

Classes Start: September 16, 2026

Wednesdays 10:00AM – 11:00AM PT

Runs for 10 weeks

With Michele Maurer and Lisa Weiner

$350 CAD

Fresh understandings of marriage come from viewing the coupling phenomenon through the lenses of attachment, emotion, and development.

Classes Start: October 1, 2026

Thursdays 9:30 AM PT (6:30 PM CET)

Runs for 5 weeks

Led by Urška Žugelj. Each week she is joined by a faculty member.
With Dr. Neufeld joining for the final session.

$150 CAD

This course unfolds Neufeld's ground-breaking model of attachment — the result of decades of synthesis, inspired by the physical and natural sciences, and built upon the most recent understandings of the brain, emotion and development.

Classes Start: October 9, 2026

Fridays 12:30PM – 01:30PM PT

Runs for 22 weeks

Anchored by Karen Bollman

$650 CAD

Intensive I provides the conceptual foundations of Neufeld's approach. Participants are equipped to use the constructs of attachment, maturation, and vulnerability to view children and their problems three-dimensionally.

Classes Start: October 15, 2026

Thursdays 11:00AM – 12:30PM PT

Runs for 17 weeks

$800 CAD

Building on Intensive I, this course sheds light upon the impact of separation on a child's personality and behaviour. When the developmental antecedents are understood, the path to effective intervention becomes clear.

Classes Start: October 23, 2026

Fridays 10:00 – 11:00 AM PT

Runs for 6 weeks

With Gordon Neufeld and Heather Ferguson

$175 CAD

Aggression problems are deeply rooted in instinct and emotion and are therefore resistant to conventional discipline practices. Dr. Neufeld uncovers these roots and outlines steps to addressing them.

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