My 17-year-old son Jacksen bounded out of his room this morning, fresh out of bed, greeting us without a hello or good morning but instead straight-up yelling, “That’s it! I’m not staying in this house today! I’m going out! And I don’t care what anybody says right now!” Did I say, “No you are not!…

There is a plethora of advice these days emerging on HOW to turn one’s home into a school. The underlying assumption is that it is indeed in a child’s best interest for this to happen. In many cases this could be true. For some children the cost could be too much.  The most important reason…

I’d like to share a few thoughts on taking care of children in alarming times. These are not new ideas by any means, more like reminders for those who are familiar with the attachment-based developmental approach. I’ll try to keep it brief as alarm has a way of shortening our attention spans. But first, some comments…

Health is something we all desire for our children. Physical health is fairly straightforward to assess, as problems usually show up in terms of pain and discomfort. Emotional health, however, is a bit trickier to measure; how do we even know what to look for?  Consider this story from Tamara … I had a weeping…

Evening balcony time with my son was our time to have the “big” talks, and this cool autumn evening when my son was fourteen was no exception. As we spoke about some of his painful school experiences, I tried to empower him, to mirror to him the amazing person I think he is.  But then he…

We have so many pressures put on us – some by others, some self-inflicted – to do things “right”.  Welcoming in another new year can sometimes feel this way, too. We make resolutions to eat better, to live better, to work out more. We create restrictions for ourselves and focus on outcomes. As a society, we…

Spoiler alert– This may make you cry. I would advise against reading if you are still under the age of 35, your middle name is ‘merry’, or your Santa Claus is coming.  It’s the time of year again when I yearn for the most melancholy music I can find. As I’m writing this, I’m listening…

Being a parent is a hard job. It is fun and scary, obvious and mystifying, exhausting and exhilarating, heartwarming and heartbreaking, clear and confusing. There are no guaranteed outcomes. There are many highs and lows, and many tears along the way – both our children’s and our own. We joke that kids should come with…

Last Fall, our three-year-old son Nathan’s favourite book was ”The Three Little Pigs.” Many afternoons were spent with Nathan pretending to be the piggy with the straw house while Emma, our five-year-old daughter, was the piggy with the wood house and Mom was the piggy with the brick house (the secure benchmark, the answer to…

Anytime I am working with the parents of adolescents, I am always excited to share insight about the pivotal concept of “counterwill” in the context of healthy development. Understanding this concept can make a tremendous difference in understanding our teenagers, especially when we feel confused or worried about their tendency to push back. First coined…

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