I’m on my way up to the mountains with my husband and two young daughters. It’s early. Still a bit dark. That’s how it is this time of year – January, on the other side of the winter solstice, and yet not very far from the shortest, and darkest, day of the year. That’s how…

Twelve years ago, when choosing the motto for the Neufeld Institute – making sense of kids – I was convinced that insight was what was needed most. I am now more convinced of this than ever. There would be no need for insight if our culture still carried its wisdom and our society was conducive…

This is a story about our little Mexican dog, Poquito, and his journey with food. It wasn’t too long after we had moved to Vancouver Island that my husband, Andrew, went on a special trip to Mazatlan with a group of youth. About halfway in, I received a phone call. Through a fuzzy connection, Andrew…

When we give birth to a child, we also need to cultivate the village of adults that will help us raise them. This community may consist of daycare workers, teachers, coaches, instructors, and extended family. This is critical as children flourish in environments where there is a seamless connection or invisible matrix of adults surrounding…

This is a story about defensive blindness – insights thanks to Butterscotch the alpaca, a garage door, and a haircut. Every morning our alpacas move from the front field to the back. When we first took over the herd, they would follow our lead. We would open the first gate and they would follow us…

I used to think the mother in me was born when I had my first child. My first thought waking up after her birth was, “I’m a mother now.” My next thought was, “Where is my baby?!” When we assume responsibility for raising a child, the ignition of strong emotions such as alarm, joy, anticipation, and…

One of the most common questions I am asked about relationships is whether a child can be too attached? There is a general fear and persistent myth that if we focus on building relationships with our kids, we may hinder their grow as independent and self-sufficient beings. There is a paradoxical relationship between attachment and…

One of the most challenging and crucial questions of our time is why some bounce back from adversity, seemingly unscathed, while others fall apart and become emotionally distraught and dysfunctional. Once upon a time and not too long ago, the dominant idea regarding stress was that it was what happened to us that told the…

Part II: Digital Behaviour Management Systems As I deepen my knowledge and understanding of the optimum conditions for helping our children reach their full potential, I have come to realize that development comes in a context of rest. Recent research on the importance of sleep serves to support this conclusion. The Neufeld developmental paradigm reminds…

Part I: Using the Agenda I have spent over 40 years working in schools supporting administrators, teachers, and staff who devote their lives to educating our children. In my role as a school psychologist I am often asked to help with children who are having difficulty behaving. Over the span of my career, I have…

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